[youngwhippersnapper]

I'm sitting here at work. Its 4:30am. I'm just halfway through my graveyard shift.

I've been thinking since I woke up earlier this evening. (yesterday was another graveyard shift and I didn't get home and to sleep till about 10:00am). Thinking can be dangerous sometimes. Not in a conventional sense of danger. Just that repeated thinking on a few certain topics will really affect your emotions.

They say that when something is worth it. You fight for it with everything that you are. I have to ask this. Am I not worth fighting for?

Nia (the girl from Cali) and I broke up today. Her words stung me to the core. "The long distance isn't worth being with you." I didn't expect her to not say this. But it still shook me a lot when she finally said it. It finally came out. After two weeks of near silence. I was fed up with dealing with the silence and delivered and ultimatum to her. I just wanted a concrete answer. Yes or no, do you still want to be with me. Thats when she told me No and said what affects me so.

Suffice it to say, I recieved a lot of flak for asking for something so direct. I don't really care anymore. I'm single again. Please don't make the suggestion that its ok for me to be single again because it will do me some good. I've been single for to long in my short time already on this Earth. I just wanted to get this off my chest. I'm not depressed, albeit a tad upset, but I'm ok. I'm not suicidal (thats a thought that has never crossed my mind). I'm not into hurting myself. So don't worry about me doing something stupid. I just am looking for some advice, preferably from some of the women on the board.

YWS