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Originally Posted by Flying Dutchman  You have always been sincere and gracious to me KC so no appologies are necessary. 
The only reason I posted what I did was just to show that divorces can be handled and dealt with in a respectable manner, as long as both parties agree or one takes the inniative and puts their foot down. I have been through two of them and both were handled with dignity and care anf fairness. The negative thinking person may say I was soft, or that my ex's were dumb, but neither are true. I am a child of divorce, like most people are, and seen how it tore my family apart. I swore that if that were to happen to me I would never put the children in the middle. Luckily my children's mother was not a bad mother. Granted, she has made mistakes (haven't we all) and refused to deal with them like she should have and is paying for that. A word of the wise to anyone who ever gets a divorce............leave YOUR problems with the other spouse at the door. It does not matter how much you may hate that person, or hate what they did, that other person is the parent of YOUR child(ren). You would not respect anybody who disrespected your mother, so don't disrespect theirs. If the other parent is a bad person, it will show and the children will figure it out without you helping. If you have to pay support, pay it. |
You are so right !!
I still talk to the ex's except of course the Kid's dad (died in 89 ) I am very happy that I didn't take him to the cleaners like I had advise to do. I could have had half of his retirement and half of everything for that matter but I just felt he was the bread winner during most of our marriage.
I know I know what a martyr .................... WRONG
Peace and having him for a friend was more important...... plus he had no problem with supporting his kids.
I had to live with myself and destroying him would have devastated them. He and I were way to young to get pregnant and then married, however it lasted 19 years and I have no regrets.
Its funny how the good times come to mind when I think of him and I see him every day that I see my kids.
Like you I was a child of divorce and my mother just could not run my dad down enough. I hated her for that and to this day I can only think of the misery she made a decision to inflict upon herself and she took it to her grave................ What a waste of life.............. not worth it.
GOD BLESS YOU !!!!!