[hoarsewhisperer]

....

Did I ever tell you folks about my Uncle Jon? Prolly not. He’s one perverted ole som beech, I tell you. He gets on his computer and pretends to be some young college kid and goes on and gits away with a flirting with some women folk on some message board somewhere. Tells them silly women that he was born in 1983. Truth be told to ya’ll, it’s more like 1938. The ole fool just celebrated his 67th birthday last month. Don’t know why he even bothers with those women when he’s really got the hots from some blonde chickie, named Nancy something. I hear she’s a cute as can be and real smart too. Which is why she’d never give him the time of day.

Uncle Jon ain’t coming over for Christmas this year either. But that’s okay by me, he’s got body odor the likes that could kill a skunk.