Volume Two.

So let me tell you whats on my mind...

Its another day here at Apache, the usual daily grind continues, its a lot like the move groundhog's day. Every day is pretty much the same, with a few little things here and there that make life interesting. Our team OIC got recalled to his home base, so we are not going to have his gold oak leaf to watch over us anymore, the new team OIC is just a CPT. Not real sure how this will effect me, but to be honest, I'm finding it harder and harder to care. And here's why. LEAVE!

At long last I get to take my R&R soon. Like, REAL soon. I will post again when I get home to let you all know that I'm back and ok, but I should be getting back to Apache on or about the beginning of November, so I'll get a break from this craziness for a while. While I am super happy to be getting out of here, there are a few things that are making me nervous about the whole going back thing. I mean, its going to be great to see the family, but I'm a pretty stoic guy, or at least I like to think I am, but I get all teary eyed just thinking about seeing my kids again, and I know I'm gonna be sobbing like a little kid when I do get to see them. I'm hopping that at least two of the four remember me, that would be a small victory as far as I'm concerned. Then there's what really weighs on my mind. Those that won't get to see their family. Those that came home under the flag. I never thought I'd let that stuff get to me, but being here at Apache has taught me a few things about myself that I didn't know. I know how its going to be in Dallas, the terminal is going to be packed with veterans and volunteers, clapping and cheering, shaking everyones hands can calling us hero. That got me choked up a little last time when I came back from Afghanistan, but that wasn't anything like Iraq. This time it's a lot more personal. I'm no hero, the guys that go out everyday and know they might not come back are heros. The guys who didn't make it back are heros. Not me. I don't see myself that way, I'm just a guy with a job who does what he's told. That whole hero thing is going to freak me out. Then I know I'll be all teary eyed again trying to get a flight to Wichita. Nothing like being the steely eyed army guy walking though the airport with tears streaming down the cheeks. That is not what I signed up for. Oh well, I suppose I'll just try to keep myself together as best as I can, and of course self medicate with a little bit of the Adult Beverages available to international travelers. .

It will be nice to drive my car again, I'll have to resist the urge to mount a weapon on the sunroof, and drive against traffic, and run stop signs, and swerve to avoid potholes and manhole covers. But I do have a radar detector, and I'll probably start referring to that as the ECM.

I plan on getting back out to Dodge while I am home, might need to find a spot where I can meet some of you nice folks for a drink or two, if its beer then great, and if its root beer, then thats good too. Going to have to do some work over at my Grandma's house, she got fired from wal-mart so she's home a lot more now I'd guess. It will be nice to see her again, she's the nicest person I've ever met, like my second mom.

Gonna be strange having people call me Justin again. Enough babble for one day, gotta go get ready for today, and try to focus on this day, then do it again tomorrow...