Thankful for my son

[Flying Dutchman]

I got a call tonight at 1:30 in the morning. Not the normal kind of call, and definitely not one any parent wishes to receive. I got a call from an officer to come pick up my 17 year old son. He was at a party and had been drinking. If I came to pick him up he would not be arrested. I told the officer I was on my way and thanked him for calling me.
While Dodge City is not the biggest of towns, the drive was quite long. He was up past the hospital, I live in the farthest area in the southwest part of town. While driving to get him, many memories came flooding to me. I remembered the calls my mother got from me when I was a teenager, to come get me because I had been drinking. I remembered the call to go get my daughter when she ran away from home. I remembered the talk I just had with my son last weekend about how proud I was with him because he was doing so well in things. I remembered I was a father.
I pulled up and was met by the officer. My son stood beside him, his head hung down in shame, grasping a ticket in his hand. I opened the car door for him and buckled him in. His eyes caught mine and he quickly turned them away. The officer told me that my son was very respectful, did not try to run away like most of the other kids did, and asked to be arrested because he deserved it. The officer then asked me to not be to hard on him. I thanked him again (we know each other) and assured him there would be no scars.
I asked my son where his car was, and he gave me directions to it. He locked it up for the night and I drove him home. He was very quiet during the drive, only saying he was sorry. I told him things will be ok and drove on in silence, listening to the wind blowing through my open window.
When we got home I again opened his door for him. His head was still hung low as we walked to the door. As he started to go downstairs to his room I stopped him. I took his chin in my hand and held his head up. I placed my arms around him and hugged him as hard as I could, holding him close to me. “I love you very much. I am glad you are ok.” I said in his ear. He cried into my shoulder as I held him and embraced me like he was afraid to let go. I do not know how long we stood there, nor did I care. I told him to go get some sleep, we will talk in the morning, and watched as he went down the stairs.


While he will get punished for doing this, nothing to harsh but harsh enough to get the point across, I can’t help but be thankful. It could have turned out so much worse. He could have tried to run, he could have got behind the wheel of a car (he was drunk), he could have got into a car with other kids who had been drinking…I could have received the call to come to the hospital…or to identify a body. A mistake was made but it did not turn out to be the last one he will ever make.

I guess I am writing this so that all of you who have children, regardless of their age, will take a moment to cherish the gift you have been given. To take their face in your hands, gaze deep into their eyes, and tell them how much you love them. Remind them that no matter what, no matter how bad things seem…your love for them never changes, never dims, will never go away. Be thankful for what you have, I know that I am.

[Granny J]

Hats off to you Dutchman. You passed the Father test with flying colors!!! Sounds to me like you have done a pretty good job with your son.
Gratitude for our blessings is always better than grief for our losses.

[jeezeweeze]

Wow FD
A tear jerker post, and you handled the life experience with such grace...You are indeed a great father, and your son is a great son.

[Made in the USA]

When I remember back at some of the things that we used to do, kids today have it a lot harder in some ways. Sounds like your Son is a responsible person, who will take responsibility for his actions. Not a lot of people want to do that today. I had an understanding Father, and I learned a lot from him, and from my actions. Looks like you are doing a good job Dutch. By the way, the Officer should be given a pat on the back too! Sounds like the type of person who will make a big difference in people's lives. Good job Officer.

[pootsy]

[ksgrainman]

You are a stand up guy FD, and sounds like it has rubbed off on your son also. We all learn from our mistakes(or should at least). Had a similar event when my son was 15yo, and rolled one of my pickups. All I wanted was him to be ok, and he was. Holy Crap, just as I was typing this post I just recieved a call that a close friends son had a ATV wreck and was Life Watched to Wichita. GTG but good job FD, and hope it works out well. Grainy

[justme]

As the person who usually goes to the house to tell the parents that their loved ones have been killed in an accident, I applaud you for how you handled this situation. I only hope I have the grace to do the same if my son gets into the same situation.

I know from my own experiences, that disappointing my dad is the harshest punishment I could ever feel.

[whoknows]

Thanks so much for sharing your story. I'm bawling as I write this, and just pray that I can be as good a parent as you. Your son has obviously had a good upbringing, and knows that he made a poor choice. From what I've read, I think you handled this extremely well, and he'll really learn from his experience. I wish all parents could handle it as well.

[K C Muffin]

Good job, FD. His punishment is knowing he let you down. No matter what else you do to him, that will be the worst. And it will stay with him. My son did the same thing to me when he was 16. I was fool enough to try to scold him when we got home. I think he got the picture anyway and has never let me down since. I imagine there's been plenty of crap that I don't know about, but he's a good dad and that's payback enough!

[Army_Strong]

I had an event like this when I was in college. My father had to drive from LaCrosse to Garden City at midnight to come pick me up. I begged the Officer to throw me in jail. My father arrived around 2 in the morning and took me home. The only thing he ever said was, "You really disappointed me tonight." I wish he would have beat me for hours. As a son being told that you were a disappointment is the worst thing ever.