Guys, What to say when caught speeding

[Bubba]

Ralph was driving home late one afternoon in his brand new Z3, and, of course, driving well above the speed limit. He notices a police car with its red lights flashing in his rear view mirror. He thinks, "I can outrun this guy!" so he floors it and the race is on. The cars are racing down the highway -- 70, 80, 90, 100 miles an hour.

Finally, as his speedometer passes 120, Ralph figures, "What the hell..." and gives up. He pulls over to the shoulder.

The police officer gets out of his cruiser and approaches the car. He leans down and says, "Listen Mister, I've had a really lousy day, and you've just made it a lot worse. Why the hell were you speeding and I don't want to hear any bullshit excuses!"

Ralph sheepishly smiles as he says: "Well, officer, I pulled right over as soon as I saw that you were alone."

"What the hell does that mean?" asks the policeman.

"Three weeks ago, my wife ran off with a police officer. When I saw your flashing lights in my rear view mirror, I thought for sure that you were trying to give her back to me!"