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07-25-2008, 06:29 PM
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| Things you can do with your GI Joe Action Figures
__________________ Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.     |
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07-25-2008, 06:31 PM
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07-25-2008, 06:34 PM
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__________________ Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all. |
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07-26-2008, 02:47 PM
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07-26-2008, 08:23 PM
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Not the ones that I saw------ |
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07-29-2008, 01:37 PM
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| --An old man, Mr. Wallace, was living in a nursing home. One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed. Nurse Tracy asked him if there was anything wrong, "Yes, Nurse Tracy," said Mr. Wallace. "My Private Part died today, and I am very sad." Knowing her patients were a little forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she replied, "Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Wallace. Please accept my condolences." The following day, Mr. Wallace was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out of his pajamas. He met Nurse Tracy. "Mr. Wallace," she said, "You shouldn't be walking down the hall like that. Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas." "But, Nurse Tracy I can't," replied Mr. Wallace. "I told you yesterday that my Private Part died. "Yes," said Nurse Tracy, "you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?" "Well," he replied, "Today is the viewing."
__________________ In the words of George Eliot Blessed is the man who, having nothing to stay, abstains from giving us worthy evidence of the fact. |
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07-31-2008, 11:50 AM
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| LORD, THEY'RE FINALLY TOGETHER ... She married and had 13 children. Her husband died. She married again and had 7 more children. Again, her husband died. But, she remarried and this time had 5 more children. She finally died after having 25 children. Standing before her coffin, the preacher prayed for her. He thanked the Lord for this very loving woman and said, "Lord, they're finally together." One mourner leaned over and quietly asked her friend, "Do you think he means her first, second or third husband?" The friend replied, "I think he means her legs
__________________ In the words of George Eliot Blessed is the man who, having nothing to stay, abstains from giving us worthy evidence of the fact. |
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07-31-2008, 12:45 PM
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07-31-2008, 01:30 PM
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| A modern Orthodox Jewish couple, preparing for a religious wedding meets with their rabbi for counseling. The rabbi asks if they have any last questions before they leave. The man asks, "Rabbi, we realize it's tradition for men to dance with men, and women to dance with women at the reception. But, we'd like your permission to dance together, like the rest of the world." "Absolutely not," says the rabbi. "It's immodest. Men and women always dance separately." "So after the ceremony I can't even dance with my own wife?" "No," answered the rabbi. "It's forbidden." "Well, okay," says the man, "What about sex? Can we finally have sex?" "Of course!" replies the rabbi. "Sex is a mitzvah a good thing within marriage, to have children!" "What about different positions?" asks the man "No problem," says the rabbi "It's a mitzvah!" "Woman on top?" the man asks. "Sure," says the rabbi. " It's a mitzvah!" "Doggy style?" "Sure! Another mitzvah!" "On the kitchen table?" " A mitzvah!" "Can we do it on rubber sheets with a bottle of hot oil, a couple of vibrators, a leather harness, a bucket of honey and a porno video?" "You may indeed. It's all a mitzvah!" "Can we do it standing up?" "No." says the rabbi." "Why not?" asks the man. "It's too much like dancing!"
__________________ In the words of George Eliot Blessed is the man who, having nothing to stay, abstains from giving us worthy evidence of the fact. |
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07-31-2008, 03:58 PM
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| preeminente, insigne, sublime...X 2 Horsie
__________________ Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all. |
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