How to feel better

[jeezeweeze]

How To Feel Better

1. Open a new file in your computer.

2. Name it "Hillary Rodham Clinton".

3. Send it to the Recycle Bin.

4. Click on "Empty the Recycle Bin".

5. Your PC will ask you, "Do you really want to get rid of Hillary Rodham Clinton?"

6. Firmly Click, "Yes."

7. Feel better.

8. PS - Tomorrow we'll do Nancy Pelosi...

[jeezeweeze]

COLONOSCOPIES
TOO FUNNY!! THE LAST ONE IS THE BEST!!
Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous..... A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:

1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!

2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'

3. 'Can you hear me NOW?'

4. 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?'

5. 'You know, in Arkansas , we're now legally married.'

6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'

7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'

8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'

9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!

10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'

11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'

12. 'God, now I know why I am not gay.'

And the best one of all..

13. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?

[357 mag]

HA HA!! Those are great!!!