Italian Boy's Confession

[Tony Clams]

' Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.'
The Priest asks, 'Is that you, little Johnny Parisi?'
'Yes, Father, it is.'
'And who was the girl you were with?'
'I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation.'
'Well, Johnny, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later, so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?'
'I cannot say.'
'Was it Teresa Volpe?'
'I'll never tell.'
'Was it NinaCapelli?'
'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.'
'Was it Cathy Piriano?'
'My lips are sealed.'
'Was it Rosa Di Angelo, then?'
'Please, Father, I cannot tell you.'
The priest sighs in frustration. 'You're very tight lipped, Johnny Parisi, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot bean altar boy now for 4 months. Now you go and behave yourself.'
Johnny walks back to his pew, and his friend Nino slides over and whispers, 'What'd you get?'
'4 months vacation and five good leads.'