Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian

[wordsmythe]

10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.

7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!

6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."


3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.

2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.

1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.

[Detector]

Amusing... You know In all my years I've never ever met a "Fundamentalist Christian" so to me it really doesn't make much sense.

Most the Christian's I've ever met were what I guess you'd call casual Christians. A lot like me. They believe the bible has some very good moral values to be learned by children, and written in a way(story) to make it interesting and understandable. It's not that they may think God waved his hand and all the first born males in Egypt died, but that there is a valuable lesson to be learned from the story.

Here is what I find more amusing.

You know science could produce actual evidence that the bible was written by some real screwballs and it wouldn't make any difference. Some people think every Christian believes the bible is gospel(excuse the pun) and by disproving it's contents somehow will change things. The fact is, all you need to do is read the bible and understand what it's really saying and it makes no difference where or from whom the scriptures came. Once you understand the bible, fact or fiction, is full of good moral values if you read between the lines, the rest doesn't matter.

[Bubba]

Originally Posted by Detector

....Once you understand the bible, fact or fiction, is full of good moral values if you read between the lines, the rest doesn't matter.

That is one thing that I can agree with you on in all the things you have posted about religion.

[Buzz]

Originally Posted by Detector

Once you understand the bible, fact or fiction, is full of good moral values if you read between the lines, the rest doesn't matter.

I can see the obvious morals that can be taught from the Bible but these morals are not unique to the Bible. Common sense morals should not require a mystical book written by Hebrews who didn't put any emphasis on rational inquiry. Making laws based on what a god says can be effective but troublesome when pressed with the law's rationality apart from that religion.

[Detector]

I can see the obvious morals that can be taught from the Bible

Thats all I'm trying to say.

You've got to remember the bible was written in a time where understanding natural occurrences was very limited. When the earth shakes and a brothel collapses it was thought to be the hand of God or Gods. What they wrote for the most part was very true in their eyes and the best account they had. To them God was pissed at the sinners and brought the house down. Moral to the story, Don't be a sinner.

Still a good moral to live by even if you know about earth quakes. Not much different than many stories we teach our kids today for the purpose of teaching values. We know as adults Chicken Little didn't really exist, although we were told the story as if it were real as kids, but we now realize the value in the story, or the truth, but still use it to teach values.

[Buzz]

The problem is that there are plenty of other stories in the Bible teach morals that not everyone agrees on. I know people who take these morals to be absolutely true and backed by the word of God. In summary, the Bible doesn't allow for any moral relativity, and when it does tell a story to teach something- it does not always make much sense for modern 21st century commoners. The Bible is full of two faced ideas and contradictions.

I do not need a book to teach me or anyone else common sense ideas just for the sake that it is an old famous book. Age and fame do not make credibility or relevancy. As a result of people's need to use the Bible we have this enormous institution that does good and bad alike, mostly on false or unsubstantiated pretenses. I have met fundamentalists, and not only have I met them, I know them all too well.

[Highwayman]

Top ten signs you are an atheist:

10. You are burning in Hell for all eternity.

The other 9 are really moot.

[Detector]

I know people who take these morals to be absolutely true and backed by the word of God.

You've got me there. I went to church 3 days a week until I was age 7 and have met many many church goers and have yet to meet just one that felt the stories in the bible were absolutely true. Now I have met many that felt the values the bible teaches is true, and I agree.

I don't need a book to teach me sticking my finger in a light socket isn't a great idea either, but reading about it can help. And while I know that illustration of the guy who does, and stands on end being shock, isn't real, I still get the moral of the story.

I think a lot people misinterpret what the bible is really trying to say and come up with some really bazaar ideas of what they think it's teaching. Thats why people go to church. To have the teaching of the bible explained. Although, I will agree today some Church's do tend to teach their own interpretations. Thats also why there are so many different denominations.

[lurker]

It was not that many years ago that our presence on Earth was mostly tribal and without a central authority for any given region. Imagine an interloper in your camp who wasn't a 'believer' in your tribe's ideologies and also imagine the threat such an interloper could be. The Koran said to kill him. Not really a bad idea for the time and the weapons of the day allowed for a better chance for his escape or survival.

Fast Forward to today's societal and technological realities BUT include the Koran's old wisdom and you get mass destruction with innocent lives being lost... all for an old idea that's beyond its time.

Some old teachings need to go away.

[Bubba]

Originally Posted by Highwayman

Top ten signs you are an atheist:

10. You are burning in Hell for all eternity.

The other 9 are really moot.

The only problem with that is that as an athiest you not only don't believe in God, but also that there is no Satan. Thus, there is no Heaven or Hell.