What's wrong with this picture?

[Highwayman]

Of course daVINman is correct about the way things work. But the problem as I see it is the bullies understand the system and use it against their victims. Using words and intimidating actions the bullies harass their victims by pushing the line but not exactly crossing it. When the victim finally breaks from the torment and lashes out it is the victim that “threw the first punch”. It is the victim that gets chastised for not being big enough to “walk away” from “words”. The bully can claim he was just “kidding around” and the victim went off on him. It is the victim that gets punished more severely and the bully gets little, if any punishment.

Yeah, the bullies figure this out and get teachers and sometimes police offices to do the dirty work for them. Eventually teachers figure it out but still have to punish the victim for not being strong enough to resist.

When you’re in school you’re told to report abuse to a teacher. This gets the bully a firm talking to and an excuse to harass the victim even more. What really works in the real world is a few well placed punches to the bully’s face. When he finds out there is a painful price to pay, he changes his behavior. Polite society hasn’t figured that out yet.

[Detector]

Words are words. Just as the very Constitution Americans hold so dear and the bible that guides many lives. Nothing but words.

[wordsmythe]

Originally Posted by Detector

Words are words. Just as the very Constitution Americans hold so dear and the bible that guides many lives. Nothing but words.

Except for the fact that the Constitution is the fountain from which all of our laws and guarantees flow and is supposed to apply to everyone equally.

[Highwayman]

Originally Posted by Detector

Words are words. Just as the very Constitution Americans hold so dear and the bible that guides many lives. Nothing but words.

There are words and then there are words. Slander, libel and perjury are a use of words that can get you in legal trouble. Assault is a threat of physical harm without physical contact and can carry criminal penalties. Our legal system recognizes that some words merit punishment.

When you tell a child to ignore words because words can’t hurt you, you may be inadvertently telling that child to allow themselves to repeatedly be a victim of criminal acts.

[Mike B.]

Originally Posted by TexKan

Words are not aggrivated battery. He screwed up when he thrusted the pencil - the first to turn violent is always to blame - frovoked or not - you can always walk away.

Tex,

When I was younger I didn't think that way. However, the older I get the more I agree with your statement. One thing I've learned over the years is that if I get mad and retaliate, it was my decision. I refuse to allow others to dictate and control my behavior! If they do, then they win and I lose.

[lurker]

In situations such as these, the realm of possibilities is too complex for generalizations with the possible exception of asking one's self this question: "What will I win if I respond with violence?"

That question is appropriate in all levels of diplomacy.

[dustinwadams5]

I believe it's really hard to judge wether this kid was justified until we know for sure what kind of harrassement he went through, because i've seen some of the mean things that other kids can do in schools. This last school year my daughter who was in Kindergarten suddenly quit wanting to go to school every morning and this girl loved school. Well come to find out a couple of kids in the 2nd or 3rd grade (can't remember which) had been picking on her on the bus every morning. What kind of harrassement does it take to make a little girl who love's school want to quit going?

[lurker]

Well come to find out a couple of kids in the 2nd or 3rd grade (can't remember which) had been picking on her on the bus every morning.

Politicians would have us (US) believe that busing students is/was the great 'equalizer' ...

[pootsy]

Originally Posted by Mike B.

Tex,

When I was younger I didn't think that way. However, the older I get the more I agree with your statement. One thing I've learned over the years is that if I get mad and retaliate, it was my decision. I refuse to allow others to dictate and control my behavior! If they do, then they win and I lose.

Exactly Mike. Most young people don't understand this though.

[Detector]

I agree Dustin. I guess it would be up to a Judge to say when harassment becomes abuse. We see metal abuse used all the time to justify a wife killing her husband,

I know we say words should not drive a child to physical violence but unless you're running for office there is a problem with that. People, even adults, are beaten, stabbed and shot on a daily basis over words.

It takes 2 to tango and all I see here is focusing on of only 1 of the dancers.